Friendship | Part 4

Last night I was taking my friend Ariel to get her car and we were behind this older car on a back street. Ariel kept telling me not to ride so close behind them because they could kill us. I proceeded to pull into the parking lot and wouldn’t you know it, they also pulled in the same parking lot. They pulled in for about 2 minutes and then left. In that two minute time frame we thought up every scenario possible and murder was the first assumption.

To assume defined by Webster is this: to take as granted or true.

As we finish out the friendship series I am excited to jump into the last lesson I have learned about genuine friendship.

Lesson #4 Genuine friendships don’t assume the worst.

People assume things about me all the time. The reality of my life is that I have dirty dishes in the sink daily. I don’t get to see my best friends on a regular basis. Richard may or may not have a flat tire consistently. And every appliance in my kitchen died at some point last year.

People who just want to be in your life for the purpose of knowing your life will assume all day. But ladies, genuine friends won’t assume because they push through the awkward, ask questions and encourage you in all seasons.

I’m learning more and more that genuine friends can’t assume things about each other or no real depth will ever evolve. If you think a friend needs to be encouraged, don’t let your thoughts and assumptions keep you from doing it. Your words could be the words she needs to move forward in obedience or to walk away from disobedience.

Unhealthy friendships that are rooted in assumptions will always leave gaps.

It creates space to fill within a friendship. It tells the person they aren’t needed, wanted or taken for granted. We assume by creating our own stories behind conversations, social media posts or not having a call or text returned.

Today I want to encourage you to pull back the reigns and allow truth to be your guide. Because if we aren’t careful the reality will become distorted and our friendships will no longer be genuine.

The friendship between David and Jonathan is one of the sweetest in scripture. In 1 Samuel 18 it says:

“1 After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself. 2 From that day Saul kept David with him and did not let him return home to his family. 3 And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. 4 Jonathan took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt.”

Everything about this screams best friends! Don’t we throw those words around so loosely now days? The answer is a huge yes! We want the picture to post so that others assume that our friendship life is goals. When we dive into the words used in this passage it really highlights just how toxic and fake I have allowed so many friendships to be over the years.

“He loved him as himself”

Are words that push me to think about the people surrounding me in this season. Do I love them well? Do I let them in? Do I show them Jesus through my vulnerabilities? Do I assume that they don’t need my prizes, encouragement or presence?

The answers are eye opening to me because I assume a lot.

Assuming is dangerous y’all because it can stop a beautiful friendship from blooming as well as cheapen the friendships you already have.

Today let David and Jonathan’s Friendship remind you that genuine friendship truly does exist.

God intended for you to be a part of the body so that the body could work well. This includes our friendships and the assumptions we have to stop making.

Be that “David and Jonathan” friend today!

Someone is counting on it I promise.